Ok, so it's been a while...
But here goes!
So this week as I've been preparing for my Sunday School lesson on suffering, I've been thinking about some things I want to share.
Suffering is inevitable. It's going to happen to all of us sometime. You know why?
Because we are alive...
On earth...
In the world...
Made of flesh.
And, this is the thing I'm really trying to embrace - suffering is a blessing.
Hear me out.
OK, so suffering starts by exposing a wound that MUST be dealt with (or the alternative is to live outside of Father's Way). The wound it exposes is deep and life altering. It makes us contemplate, question, SCREAM for answers. It shows us that what we thought - what we live life on - might not be true. And the suffering may initially attack physically, but it immediately moves internal, making us question our reason, our beliefs. Ultimately, if we dig deep enough through our selfish protective coating, we realize that the question we are most afraid of asking is this:
Why would God let this happen to me?
We are scared to ask this because we are most afraid of the answer...
It's so much safer to call our friends and tell them our version of the story, and then get their opinion and solution. They are like us and they LIKE us so their response will probably make us feel better... but sooner or later that layer of "you don't deserve this" icing melts away and the questions consume us again...
And then there's the "busy" solution - "If I just stay busy, I won't have to think about it."
So, we dive into our schedule. We take on projects and clean our house. We join a bible study or volunteer. But, eventually we just wear ourselves out and the questions are still there...
So then we might even try to avoid the questions that keep haunting us in the dark by finding a way to numb the pain. Maybe we use chocolate or shopping or alcohol or the arms of another or _________(you fill in the blank). But, sadly, these things only mask the pain. And once our binge has worn off, the pain returns with a new buddy, Shame.
I've been there. I've been assaulted by a pain I never dreamed in my worst nightmare I could ever survive. And, when it hit me, I didn't know what to do but cry out to Jesus. So, that's what I started to do. The questions came like tsunami waves:
How did this happen?
How can I survive?
What about my kids?
What will people think?
How do I fix this?
What does God think?
Where is He?
Does He know about this?
Why is He letting this happen to me?
Back to the question that gets to the heart of it all - Why, God?
This is where the blessing shows up. It's in asking God the hard questions that He begins to show us why we are hurting. Until we truly die to this world, we will always leave room to suffer. Because only something living can feel the pain of suffering.
We are afraid that His response will be
YOU DESERVE IT
But, that's the thing - even though we do deserve His wrath in judgment because of the bad choices we've made, His answer to our deepest questions leads us to HIM. And He tells us to look at who He is.
You are worried about how you will survive this? Look at me - I'm your Healer
You are worried about how you will make ends meet? Look at me - I'm your Provider
You are worried about how this happened? Look at me - I'm sovereign over all creation.
Question after question leads us to Him!
As a believer who has experienced Him as Healer, Provider, Protector, Father, I can tell you that suffering is a blessing. I don't usually like it; I certainly don't have all the answers! But, I am learning that suffering's ultimate purpose is to drive my flesh farther into the grave and set my spirit free to live in Christ.
If you are struggling with something, if you are trying to survive the pain and this seems like "pie in the sky", please understand that I KNOW what you're going though hurts and seems hopeless. I can't promise you that the suffering will easily go away. But, I can promise you that you are not alone. Ask the tough questions, but be willing to listen to His answers. The enemy wants to scare you away from God, but God is the only Way to get you through this.
Sometimes people question how God could let those He loves suffer.
Romans 5:8 addresses this for me:
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
God suffered so much through the death of His only Son. He didn't deserve it, but He chose it because of His great love for us. Our sufferings are for our benefit so we will stop depending on ourselves and finally truly live in Christ.
